By Geanice Gee, M.A.
So, you’ve taken the first step, and have agreed to go out
on a date. But now you don’t know what the two of you are going to discuss. In
fact, you don’t know what questions will be seen as offensive because in the
past you’ve said some things that should’ve been left unsaid.
Fortunately, those were learning experiences, and now you
know from the past that you have to be well prepared before going on a date. In
order to prepare for your date, I’ve listed some tips for asking questions that
could be incorporated into your conversation.
1. Background questions are
very important. During your date, you should get to know this person; in fact, getting
to know your date should be your main objective. Therefore, this could be seen as
the interview stage as you are both the interviewee and interviewer.
a.
Who is this person?
i. Before going on the date, one
suggestion would be to conduct a Google search; check out this person’s online
activity (public criminal record) to see if this is the type of person you want to be associated with.
ii. Introduction: you should
start the date by introducing yourself; throughout the date, try to ask
questions that are open ended and require more than just a yes or no answer.
For example:
1.
What do you like/dislike?
2.
Have you ever been married?
3.
What do you do for a
living?
4.
Have you ever been incarcerated?
WARNING: This question could be seen as a turn-off or offensive to some,
but just like an employment application, this question is important, but it
doesn’t necessarily disqualify the person.
2.
Goals
a.
What are your future plans?
b.
What are you doing to make
these goals possible?
c.
Where do you see yourself
in the next five years?
d.
Could you see yourself in a
relationship that leads to marriage?
Again, this post is intended to help daters generate ideas
for asking questions during their first date. Similar to an interview, you want
to ask questions to see if this person is compatible. Good luck!
