Dating: The Single Parent

By Geanice Gee, M.A.

Did you know that ninety-two percent of single parents would rather date other single parents? Being a single parent presents its challenges, and could often feel equivalent to a full-time job for some. In addition to taking care of yourself, you have another person's interest to consider. Therefore, good parents put their child's needs before their own. 

As a single parent, it's best to be selfless, organized, and patient. Having to provide for another, most single parents put their priorities in order, which often places dating and their love life on the back burner. To most single parents, their child's happiness is much more important than their own, and at times, some parents keep their guards up because of failed relationships; some fear being hurt again.  

As a single parent, you are the child's sole provider/guardian; therefore, you take on numerous roles in addition to any work done outside of the home, such as working a full-time job or obtaining a higher education. In fact, the single parent often takes on the role of a nurse, tutor, counselor, and a role model. Being a single parent can draining and time consuming, therefore, it's of most importance to find a partner who is able and willing to work with their obligations. 

As a role model, a single parent should lead by example and display characteristics of a person he or she would like his or her child to become. Single parents must face the fact that their children watch their every move and look to them for guidance. Children are very impressionable; therefore, parents must be mindful and cautious when dating and bringing partners in and out of their child's life. 

However, single parents shouldn't feel the need to limit their happiness; instead, those who are struggling with time management should work on this area in order to find that special person.  As a parent, you would like the best for your child, so show this through your actions. Some aspects that a single parent should focus on when dating include:

• Being  selective 
• Being able to manage/balance time 
• Conducting  a background check 
• Refraining from introducing your child to one nightstands/flings 
• Including your child in activities 
• Dating someone that likes children 
• Putting your child's needs first 
• Making sure your child gets along with the person 
• Making sure the person is genuine, and with you for the right reasons 

*The key to any successful relationship is effective communication and the ability to manage/balance time.